Surprises

Post by Megan:

At 11am mass, we discussed surprised answers or comments God gives us. Well here is mine:

As many of you know, this summer was truly amazing for me. My relationship with God grew SO much stronger and I learned so much about the truth of the Bible. I finally found my identity after 20 years of searching.

Upon this wonderful journey God spoke to me. He told me to sacrafice something big--a huge part of my life. I was excited at first because I was so ready to be used by God and willing to do anything for Him. I thought this was the perfect opportunity for me, and my relationship with God. But then I thought about it...and prayed about it. Is God really telling me to do this? Think about how some people might not understand, think about how lost I will be without this part of my life, about how much stress I will have.

Then upon eatting breakfast one morning, I saw my brother-in-laws bible open. I took a gander at the page. Something was highlighted and caught my eye. It was Proverbs 3:1-8. "Let your heart keep my commands... Let not mercy and truth forsake you... TRUST in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, ad He will direct your paths. Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the Lord and depart from evil. It will be health to your flesh and strength ot your bones."... WOW! God was speaking to me. He knew what I was doing and told me to stop. "lean not on your own understanding." I was to stop thinking about what others would like, and how I was going to get through it, but instead trust in the Lord. If He wants me to sacrifice and I do sacrifice, then He will provide for me.

'Ok. Trust in the Lord. Trust in the Lord. God you want me to do this? You got it.' And off I went, finding open doors. I did everything I could in order to follow God's calling. I left myself so open. But all I received were closed doors. 'God, You're sending me mixed signals, please, if you want me to sacrifice this, you have to open another door for me.'' Weeks went by and nothing happened, well besides me becoming very emotionally torn. Time was running out. The more closed doors I received, the more I thought maybe I was interpreting God wrong. But I was so sure!

Then something powerful happened. A meeting I had with good friends which lead to an epiphany! Things were becoming more clear. I was wrong about what God had wanted me to sacrifice. Hurray! I can return to the life I was to sacrifice--CRASH! This thought lasted maybe 10 minutes then God put something else in my life.

'GOD I'M SO CONFUSED!! WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO! I am so willing to sacrifice for You. I know if I do, You will provide for me, I'm not scared, but please just give me a straight answer and stop these mixed signals!' Again with the tearing of emotions. So I called my sister. "Maybe God wants YOU to make the decision," she said. 'Sometimes either path can lead you to glorify God, but it's up to you to choose which path glorifies Him the most.'

True story. 'So God, You want me to decide? Ok. Done.' And I decided. But was I being selfish and choosing the path I wanted and not what would be best for Him? I feared yes. And then like my 16th birthday party when all my friends were hiding in the garage and upon walking in--SURPRISE!!! (Which caused me to jump so high, I'm amazed I didn't hit my head on the ceiling.) God hit me with it. 'You were wrong about not being able to glorify Me in the path you choose,' He said. He showed me so many things I had not realized before. Being able to glorify God was everywhere. I just wasn't open to see it before. But He opened my eyes. He was able to, because I opened my heart to Him. I allowed and wanted Him to show me these things. Yes my decision might have been selfish, but He showed me SO many ways I can glorify Him with the path I chose.

Touche God. Touche. You are truly amazing.